Deserving.

I wanted to blog more this week. I really want to do my book haul because they came in the mail.

And I wanted to do a post about how I am so excited because I became a Goodreads Librarian! I am such a nerd...but I went on there and edited information and added translations in Japanese and English to a few books I own. I want to spread Goodreads to Japan. Tons of people in Japan love to read, and I have been getting more into Japanese books, so I want to add Japanese books and translate descriptions and Author profiles to be more accessible.

I am trying to finish Ender's Game tonight because I am seeing the movie tomorrow, and it isn't popular in Japan, so it might leave theaters soon.

I also wanted to do my Tegomass Album review. I will get around to it.

But I have been experiencing intense pain due to stress recently. I go to the chiropractor a lot and they massage me and help my neck a lot. But lately teaching at school, grad school applications, etc., have been making me so stressed that my body is attacking me.

Since about a week ago I have been having a lot of stomach aches. My mom works in the medical field and told me she's had the same thing I have before, and that stressing out has created excess acid in my stomach. Unfortunately, I can't just got pick up good medicine at the store. Japanese OTC medicine is extremely weak, so most people go to the hospital to get treated. But I refuse. I hate hospitals.

This weekend I am going to have some relief. I am meeting up with friends and I should have a pretty fun weekend with no stress. So I hope to be up to my regular, blogging-self soon!

I hate not blogging because so much happens every day and I want to remember it and share it. But my health comes first, and I need to learn to relax.

I think most of my stress comes from me not feeling like I deserve a break. I am really hard on myself, and even getting treated at the chiropractor, which is my favorite part of the week, makes me stress out because I feel bad for going in there. Isn't that messed up? I feel bad that I am paying for a service that relieves my pain.

Why do we feel that we don't deserve a break?

Anyway....

Happy Chinese New Year!